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Psycho Cats [userpic]

Yesterday

March 30th, 2014 (08:15 am)
current mood: whiny

This time it was just ME getting dragged off to the torture chamber. Mommy had said she was going to "skip" this year but then felt guilty every time she got a reminder postcard, email, or phone call from the Torturer's office. She could have just asked me how *I* felt! I am just fine with never going there again!

Apparently taking all 3 of us together is just too much for her to handle. Whatever. So she has to pick on ME?! We're due for these things called "rabies shots" and she said since I sneak outside at night sometimes and refuse to come back in, it's more important that I get it than the others. Hmph. I didn't go quietly, of course. I scratched the bejeezus out of her left arm and got a little bit of her right. She didn't have time to clean up so she showed up down there wearing those battle wounds that I inflicted. The meannies' looks of horror at the chamber made me proud. She likes to tell everyone how sweet I actually am. Ha! And that when I "bite," it's not really biting, it's just like grabbing hold, it doesn't hurt. Well, I COULD make it hurt, if I wanted. I would have, but what sucks is I can't mess her up TOO badly cuz I need her to serve me still!

I whined all the way down there and all the way back, just to make sure she knew how displeased I was about all this nonsense. I also peed in my cage in case she still didn't get it. From the limited exam I allowed them to do, everything seemed normal. (well, DUH, like I said - I'm fine!) They had to put a towel over me so I couldn't see what they were doing. I have to admit, I did feel safer being under there. -And I weigh 13.25 pounds.

Snickers and Gryffin ran and hid the rest of the day, clearly thinking they're next... as well they should have been... but nope, only me. IT'S SO UNFAIR.

~Anakin

Psycho Cats [userpic]

I am expensive...

August 18th, 2013 (06:47 am)
awake

current mood: awake

...but worth it!

Not sure what "expensive" means but Mommy told me that's what I am.

The fancy tests they tortured me with last time showed nothing wrong. But I kept throwing up violently and Mommy was still worried so she dragged me down to the torture chamber again. I did it four times in about a week. She thinks I've lost more weight. She was sure I was getting worse, that maybe I had something wrong with my stomach like Bailey did. I knew it wasn't like that; he was really SICK and I'm fine! She didn't listen to me, though. I tried to tell her, loudly, the whole way there, to turn around. Humans only hear what they want to hear. I think she was pissed at me cuz that last time I did it in a very inconvenient place, almost ruined some electronic stuff she has. She yelled at me like I did it on purpose.

Mommy was expecting they'd have to cut me up which I'm sure I wouldn't like at all... instead, the torturer said to try out some different food. I'm probably allergic to something. I didn't have what Bailey did, because if I did, I'd be gone by now -- he was very blunt about that. He is a human, so she believed him, when I tried to tell her the same thing all along. Hmph. She asked him if I was in pain (hello?!?! why not just ask ME?! I told her I wasn't!) and he said no, only right before I threw up, like the feeling that humans get and then after you puke it goes away.

So. If I have to eat different food, it means everyone has to. For a while she couldn't tell if Gryffin likes it or if he'd have to be fed special... but we all do like it. She was told to phase out the old food slowly, and today is the last day we eat any of that cheap stuff. The outside cats can have it. And I heard Mommy telling Cassie it would be nice if she eats outside more too because of how expensive it is. It's made with rabbits and green peas, stuff that's not commonly found in other food... and it's "hypoallergenic," which is a fancy word that means I should stop throwing up now.

Mommy's keeping a log and I've only thrown up once in the past 2 weeks. As for my weight... the torturer said it was the same as last time, but it was 8 pounds 1 ounce and Anakin listed it here as about 9 pounds. Maybe he rounded it up instead of down?

For the humans that read this who know about money... an 8lb bag of my fancy food costs $59, and a 5.5oz can costs $2.70 (I'm the only one that eats the soft stuff in the cans, she sits there and makes sure no one trades chow spots with me every morning). She's used to spending like $11 or $12 for a 20lb bag, and $0.50 per can. I guess that's a big difference. She said after a while she'll try some food that's in between those two and see if it makes me sick or not, after I've gone a while without throwing up and she's sure it's the food that was causing it.

We don't get to update our journal that much... Mommy stopped using hers so it's kind of hard to get on here. And her new computer is a "notebook" (I thought those were books of paper?) that she never leaves the lid up... we can't raise it ourselves, so limited opportunity to get on here. How are you guys doing???

~ Snickers

Psycho Cats [userpic]

*hack cough wheeze* AH-CHOO!

January 12th, 2013 (03:53 pm)
sick

current mood: sick

So, all 3 of us have an upper respiratory infection, otherwise known as a cold. I've heard Mommy say that colds are no big deal. When SHE was really sick a few weeks ago, she didn't go get herself tortured. Why did we have to go?! But she dragged us all down there. Gryffin made her bleed when she jammed him into the box thing to carry us. Then she did me, I was pretty mellow because I'm not feeling that great (I still whined all the way there though)... it took her forever to catch Snickers, and she's the sickest of us. Thought we'd be waiting there all cramped up forever. Gryffin, the idiot, he peed in his box so he had to sit there in it for a long time. I've learned it's better NOT to do that.

Mommy thought since I was sick and went into my box so easily that maybe I for once wouldn't give the torturer a hard time. No way! I was pissed at the way I was being grabbed at. And I've learned that if you're hostile enough, they WON'T stick things up your butt, they skip that part. The other two haven't quite caught on to that yet, they sit there all scared and just let him do whatever.

You know what else is annoying? Mommy blamed this virus thing on ME. Because I run outside sometimes and if she's too lazy to chase me, I stay out there all night once in a while (not lately -- too cold!). But I'm sure it was Cassie that gave it to us. And did SHE have to go see the torturer? Nooooooo!

My weight: 14-something pounds. A little heavier than last time, still normal.
Gryffin: 11-something pounds. About the same.
Snickers: 9 pounds, lost weight since last time. Mommy was worried about this, and because in recent months she's been throwing up more than anyone else, so Snickers got extra torture.

We all got our shots even though we're sick, because Mommy felt that would be less mean than bringing us back (I guess I agree with that *grumble*), and we all got antibiotic shots that last for 2 weeks -- if we're still sick then, she might drag us back there anyway. Snickers got these pills that are supposed to help her be less snotty, and we're all supposed to share as needed. I heard Mommy say she'd try sneaking them into our food. I'm not eating anything that tastes disgusting, I'll tell you that! I watched her make Snickers choke one down -- no way am I letting her do THAT to me either. We all got treats after, that was a good deal.

Mommy says we're lucky the antibiotics come in a shot now. She paid extra for that so she wouldn't have to give us pills twice a day. Whatever, she's still gonna try to make us eat those other nasty pills. We're also lucky we don't have pneumonia and except for the snot, seem to be otherwise healthy. Mommy will hear more about my sister on Monday cuz some outside lab has to look at her blood. Why would something be wrong with her blood? I think Mommy's just paranoid.

I see Gryffin's already forgiven Mommy for her meanness. I'm going to be cold and aloof to her for at least another few hours. Then I MIGHT let her pet me. If I feel like it. For now she gets the evil eye.

~ Anakin

Psycho Cats [userpic]

Happy Birthday to me! (and Anakin)

June 2nd, 2012 (08:30 pm)
calm
Tags:

current mood: clean

Photobucket

This is why Cassie is still allowed inside on a limited basis. She bathes me!

~ Snickers, 9 years young today!

Psycho Cats [userpic]

Ummm

May 5th, 2012 (03:51 pm)
stressed
Tags:

current mood: stressed

I don't know what's going on lately but things are weird around here! You know how the 3 of us live in this house with Mommy and never go outside, and there are 4 other "lesser status" cats that come inside sometimes but DO leave the house? Well now it's just us 3 plus Cassie (only once in a while, like once a week) because Mommy is weak. Mommy says it's because she wants me to be less stressed out and stop peeing on things.

I'm still stressed out! First, Grandpa fixed a door and I stopped being allowed to go in the garage, which is one of my favorite hangouts. Then this guy that I don't know showed up and slept here for a while. He was nice, he paid more attention to me than Mommy does! I started liking him and decided he could be my friend... then he disappeared. Now there's new stuff all over the place, and Uncle Brian started sleeping here the same time all that stuff showed up. And today everything got moved around AGAIN when these men with loud machines came in and I had nowhere safe to hide and it was very scary! And now the floors are wet everywhere -- Mommy better not blame me for that, I'm innocent!

Can't things just stay the same all the time? Except, well. "The same" means Anakin still picks on me. He is a bully and as long as HE lives here, I'm going to have some stress. Cassie's okay I guess. And Snickers has been sweet to me lately; I think she misses those outside creatures. But meh... I'd be fine with just Mommy and Uncle Brian. If I was the only cat, I'd get to be king! It would be good to be king...

~ Gryffin

Psycho Cats [userpic]

Mean Mommy, Case #1003

September 4th, 2011 (08:06 am)
lazy
Tags:

current mood: lazy

I know Mommy's been gone a lot lately. Something about lots of work. But when she is home, she needs to pay a little more attention to me.

The other night she opened a door to a closet -- one that I know houses our food. So of course I am duty-bound as a cat to go investigate and see about getting into the bag of food. You know what Mommy did? She CLOSED THE DOOR. While I was still in there. Now, she does this sometimes because she thinks it's funny; if I run into the open fridge, she'll close it for a few seconds and then open it so I come running out and she doesn't have to drag me. I figured this was like that. So I busied myself with ripping open the bag and chowing down.

It was dark in there, but I could still see because the light in the hall was on, and a little bit came under the door. Then it got totally dark and quiet. She went to bed! I thought, okay, surely she'll notice I'm not on the bed with her... NOPE. Did I do something to piss her off and she felt she had to punish me? I wondered. Of course I knew I didn't deserve this treatment, no matter what my alleged offense was. It was crowded in there but I managed to get a towel down off one of the shelves and I slept on that.

The next morning when I heard her get up, I started yowling. She heard me and called my name. Um, hello, TRAPPED HERE. It took her a little while to figure out where I was. I heard her open the garage door, the bathroom door, the front door... she totally forgot that she even opened this door the night before, apparently. DUH, I didn't get in there on my own! Then she was squishing me and spewing apologies... I don't mind the apologies, I deserved those, but I wriggled out of the squishing and voiced my complaints at being manhandled after such trauma.

She fed me treats later so I decided to forgive her.

I caught her later inspecting the closet for signs that I'd used it as a litterbox. Pfffft, I'm not Gryffin!

Excuse me, I have a ray of sunshine to go sprawl out in.

~ Anakin

Psycho Cats [userpic]

I still haven't found what I'm lookin' for...

April 19th, 2011 (05:49 pm)
busy
Tags:

current mood: busy

...Mommy says that's a "you too" song. Whatever that means? She's strange.

Gosh, I think we forget to write in here unless it's torture chamber time!

Every night when Mommy gets home, I go spend quality time in the garage. I like to chill on top of this huge white thing in there (Mommy calls it a "car"). Last night I got lucky -- she forgot to roll the window all the way up, and I managed to wriggle my way inside! I have long suspected that our food comes from this thing somewhere, but I've never gotten to explore the inside of it like that. Unfortunately I didn't find anything. It must be hidden real good.

Mommy came out after a while to put something in there and she laughed when she saw me sitting in the driver seat. Don't listen to her if she says I couldn't figure out how to get out -- I could! I just wasn't done looking yet! And I only acted kinda scared-like because for all I knew she could be taking me away for more torture, and there I was, trapped with her blocking my only escape! But she just pulled the side open and I ran out real easy.

I'm not the troublemaker that makes her play "count the cats" before going to bed, though. That's Anakin's territory. He STILL runs outside sometimes even when people are trying to block him. He's even made poor Grandpa BLEED (by tripping him in the doorway). Isn't that mean?

Okay, time to go hang out on the white thing again and see if I can get inside it tonight too...

~ Gryffin

Psycho Cats [userpic]

More Mean Mommy

January 29th, 2011 (03:55 pm)
dirty

current mood: dirty

Another report from a torture session. I suppose this time wasn't as bad as it's been previously... Anakin only attacked humans, not me or Gryff, so that's good.

Mommy thinks the worst part is getting us into those tiny little boxes to go in the car. I guess I can see why she thinks that... I did pee on her while she so rudely manhandled me! Hey, I didn't want to go in there, I verbally expressed my displeasure, she didn't heed my warning. Not my fault! And she had to get the ladder out to get to me; when I saw my 2 favorite escape routes blocked, I went way up high. Gryffin somehow managed to flip his box upside down and jar the door loose. If I wasn't having a "OMG PUT ME DOWWWWWN" moment I might have been impressed -- Mommy was annoyed when she saw him run past us after she'd already caught him!

But that's not the worst part, in my opinion. I think the worst part is when they stick things up your butt. Owie! Gryffin and I were very well-behaved, but Anakin was so bad that no one stuck nothin' up him. Now, if you ask me, I think that's totally unfair! Where's the incentive to be nice if it just makes them do more stuff to you??? I'm pretty peeved about that.

We're all in good health, and I heard the torturer say that if it wasn't for the other kitties we come in contact with, we wouldn't need any shots for 3 years...but since Mommy runs a cat hotel, we're supposed to go every year. She's reminding me that we skipped last year anyhow. Pfft.

The torturer said Anakin is "an interesting cat." Something about the way he was acting... which wasn't like a scared cat or a vicious cat... "he's just plain pissed off." Heh, yeah, that's a good way to describe my brother when he's in one of his moods!

Our weights were:
Me - 10.9 pounds (about the same)
Gryffin - 11.6 pounds (about the same)
Anakin - ...hmm, I don't remember and it's not listed on the bill for some reason - I think it was 13.8 which was a little fatter than last time.

Excuse me while I go lick the rest of the germs off me...

~ Snickers

Psycho Cats [userpic]

Barf alert

January 6th, 2011 (06:38 pm)
hopeful
Tags:

current mood: helpful

This morning, I gobbled my breakfast quickly like always. With so many breakfast companions, I've learned that he who hesitates gets less food! Anyway, it didn't sit right with me, so I puked it up a short while later.

Mind you, I'm kind enough to give warning when I have to barf. It doesn't just instantly come up. I gotta work at it! If Mommy doesn't like the spot I choose to puke on, she can RUDELY shove me aside. If she's not in the room when I start my warning, or if she's asleep or otherwise occupied, there's nothing I can do about it.

She wasn't in the room this morning until the very last second, but then when she realized what was happening, it was too late: I was on the bathroom counter, and instead of aiming for the sink like I usually do, I decided to puke on her open make-up bags. I got two of them in one shot!

Mommy didn't appreciate my mad puking skillz, though. In fact, she YELLED at me! Can you believe it? She knows the rules! She lost the game. What a sore loser!

Usually she lets our vomit sit around for a while before cleaning it up, in case one of us decides to eat it which totally happened today as well with a little pile on the carpet. Licked it clean! but this time she started frantically dumping things out and wiping the little containers and doohickies and saying bad words. We would have gotten around to cleaning what we could if she'd just left it, sheesh!

The junk is still there on the counter. I seem to recall her saying a long time ago that she needed to throw out the really ancient stuff, she just hadn't gotten around to it. Thanks to me, she will be getting around to it now. See what a good boy I am? She doesn't appreciate how helpful I am!

~ Anakin

Psycho Cats [userpic]

Beds, boyfriends, balls

October 16th, 2010 (11:39 am)
indifferent
Tags:

current mood: indifferent

I've been whining at Mommy to put up our window beds out back (they fall down sometimes for no reason -- I mean, it's not like we ever fight over who gets to sleep in them or anything... *shifty look*) and she kept telling me she'd do it in the fall because it's too hot outside. Never mind the fact that I've been hanging out in the heat all summer; it doesn't bother me one bit! She finally got her arse in gear and put them back up. I still don't like the newer one, but I was the first one to test out the older one for sturdiness. It meets my specifications. I had my morning nap in it, now I'm letting Cassie sleep there.

I think Snickers has a new boyfriend. Twice I've caught her snuggling with Sangha (aka "Harold" or "the friendly one" or "the fat one"). That dude has a crazy-loud purr. Purrsonally I think it's kinda undignified for a cat to purr that loud. Mine's so quiet Mommy can barely hear it with her human ears (which of course are inferior to kitty ears).

And Mommy finally came to her senses and agreed with Uncle Brian that the mean tuxedo kitty is a boy, not a girl. She thought just because she couldn't see or feel any balls, it had to be a girl. Duh, I coulda told her otherwise! I can't feel MY balls and I'm a boy!

~ Gryffin

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